Thoughts on Karma

I have recently had great inclinations to explore the concept of karma. It’s funny how life allows these lessons to surface and re-surface offering adventuresome thoughts and curiosity. I wonder why bad things happen or at least what I would consider uncomfortable or bad situations occur and I have come to the conclusion that if these things did not hit me in the face I might be so dull that I would never change or grow or expand my understandings. It is a bit of a perverted way to find gratitude for the down side of life but it works for me. I have a tendency to be thick in the head and I think Spirit needs to smack me head on once in awhile so that I question the world around me in order to further my experience and understanding. Imagine if life was hunky dory all the time I would become very complacent and comfortable and probably a lot thicker.
So recently I have had to face some situations that make me question Karma. As is typical human nature, I first point fingers at the people I believe responsible for the “bad” part of the situation whether it be ex-husbands, school officials, county workers, whomever, they get my blame first and I question the Karma of these folks. Sometimes it helps me forgive or pity them instead of engage in anger because it is my understanding that Karma is the effect of everything we do being put out into the Universe affecting our past, present and future and our loved ones. I explain it to my children as anything you do, say or put out comes back to you tenfold. Believe me, that can stop a sibling battle for all of three seconds as they contemplate it and move on with new tactics just as ridiculous but now fraught with, “but they did it!”
So, when these people I have recently struggled with put out “bad” behavior or at least act in ways that I could not fathom or ethically agree with, I think of their karma. What they are doing will come back and smack them in the butt ten times harder. Really, it makes me feel better. I get into my lovely lower mind and think, “Ha, ha, God is going to kick your butt!” and I imagine all these wonderful ways that God might find opportunity to accomplish this task. I even offer to help Spirit fulfill this effort of karmic balance. I mean, wouldn’t that be fun?
Then I realize that I am putting out my own karma. I suddenly feel like Linus in “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” when he realized he said the word “if”. What have I done?! What kind of Karma am I putting out there? Ack! Now I am hoping for Karma to avenge me. Who do I think I am? Have I lost all of my humility and allowed my ego to take over? Just what am I allowing these people to take from me anyway? Oh boy, now I have done it! Wayne Dwyer says that he heard the ego described as edging out God-E…G…O. I think maybe I haven’t edged God out completely, I was just willing my own fate on those from whom I feel wronged and being a willing servant to help dispurse justice. But in that statement alone, haven’t I assigned my self as judge? Wow! What Moxy I have in God’s shoes! Let me just step my little feet out of those shoes and let go now.
What others do is between them and God. What I do is between me and God. What we do to, for and with each other is affecting our relationship between us and the Universe. While it is fun to fantasize about someone who has acted in my opinion unethical or heartless as coming back in another life time as a cockroach, the fantasy alone is Karma. So, what can I do? What power do I have? When I feel wronged or rendered powerless and I want to take control, spite or at least fantasize about slapping someone with at least some karmic justice, what can I do? Ugh…all I can do is pray. I can surround that person with golden light and myself with golden light and just pray. Release my ego from it and have faith. Give it to God and know that God is in charge. The Universe has Divine order. As they say in the Spike Lee film, “Step off!” Walk away and turn the other cheek.
Oh it is hard sometimes. My human journey has given me such great opportunities to feed my ego and great desire to disperse justice in the world. Maybe I need to use prayer, meditation or the laws of attraction to bring in opportunity to be done with that lesson, now. I can grow past it and no longer attract those situations into my life. Then I keep my Karma cleaner and focused on myself. That feels better for everyone. I feel better and it truly is all about me, you know. And in that light, I can be clearer in my intuition, my connection with Spirit and wiser in my further interactions. Knowing that all things are in Divine order and God is driving, I can surround myself with the Golden light of God’s vehicle and ease on down the road enjoying the scenery and open with curiosity about what comes next. Hopefully, a little less thick in the head.